Tuesday, May 25, 2010

"Poopie is NOT Paint!"

Our son is going to be three in a week or so and we are dealing with what I am afraid is the terrible 3's. How come that it wasn't until after he was already two that people told us that terrible twos was a myth and that 3 was much worse?
Let me just give you an example. As previously posted my wife and I went to the NASCAR race on Saturday night and we got home kind of late. The Prince here had spent the night at his Grandparent's house but we all had to be at Sunday service early because he had to sing in the children's choir. Needless to say after this was over we were all really tired and also had an even to go to Sunday afternoon so Mommy and Daddy decided that everyone at our house had to have nap time.
I had no problem sleeping and neither did Mommy but apparently in the little man's room it was art time. I was awoken by Mommy saying, "What ARE you doing?" This little angel had gone poop and removed his diaper and there was poop everywhere. On the child, the sheets, the blankets, the pillowcases, the crib, and the walls. My wife asked him what did he ever think he was doing and his response? "I was painting Mama. See all the paint"
What?
This was when I responded with the latest in the long line of phrases I never thought I would ever have to say to another human being, "Poopie is not Paint!"
I promise you that it took us half an hour just to clean him and the poop off the crib. It almost made us late for what we were going to. Who does that? Who uses their poop as finger paint? Just the thought gives me the creeps.
I wonder what our little Prince has in store for us next. Did your kids ever do anything like this? Please tell me that eventually it gets better.

-Doc



20 comments:

Dana said...

Oh sure! It gets better!

When he's 14 you'll be saying things like, "Son, why are there 5 empty bottles of lotion in your room?"

Paige said...

Mine did it too. All those things you never thought you'd say, you will.

The AbsolutGator said...

When the AbsolutPrincess was 3 and potty-training:

Her training involved going around naked and when she had to go, she knew she had to go to the bathroom since there was nothing there to 'catch' it. And it worked really well, except this one time when she and the AbsolutWife were not seeing eye-to-eye. Upset at Mommy (I've forgotten what about), she stood next to the couch, looked right at Mommy and proceeded to pee on the floor.

Yeah, I'm looking forward to the teen years. Ugh!

Karen said...

Yuck.

Raquel's World said...

I have a princess that will be three in 3 weeks. She was previously worthy of her princess status. However, the past few months she has been a whiney brat and really tested my limits. I was hoping that we were gonna be over this when she turns 3. Now you tell me people say 3 is worse! You have just singlehandedly ruined my positive light at the end of my two year old tunnel. Thanks!

Disaster Chick said...

I remember hearing about an artist that used "poopie" as his medium: I did a quick google search: http://www.thelocal.de/society/20081223-16325.html

Candy Minx said...

It toally gets better. Ha I've heard of lots of kids doing this...and


don't worry there is actually something scarier than this story and what he did....


...he might grow up to be an artist!


:)

Mrs. D said...

LOL, sorry but I have to laugh. My oldest was/is waaayy too picky about things to have done this. One time he put his hand in his dirty diaper he FREAKED out, so we were lucky... no artwork from him, lol. Child #2... I am betting this event could be in my very near future. Let me know what worked best in the clean up, I'll probably need the tips.

rxBambi said...

bahahahaha!

look on the bright side. my sister did the same thing and now she has a phd in mucosal immunology -- like gut stuff. looks like she was always interested in guts and poo and all that ;)

Monkey's Mom said...

LMFAO! This exact thing happened while hubby and I were babysitting for my niece. Hubby walked in the room and I could hear down the hall "What the F*** is that!" (yes he said that to our two year old niece, classy. lol)
It was the worst thing in the world, my eyes are scarred and I just did a little gag thinking of that incident (and I don't have a gag reflex) gag. It look a good 30-45 minutes to clean up and a shower for both my niece and me.
When we found out we were pregnant with Monkey, first thing hubby said "by god if our kid does what our niece did, I'm not cleaning it. We will just move." lol

Jay said...

That is sooooo gross. I'm NEVER having kids dude. hahaha ;-)

Micky-T said...

Ulgh! Thick smelly paint.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Neither of mine did that, but I've heard tales. 4 can be trying times, also....they're like little attorneys: always up for an argument or an upgrade ("How 'bout TWO cookies?")

Warrior_Kat said...

Hahaha! Jay's comment cracks me up. Your son looks exactly like you! I don't have any kids, so I've never experienced that, but I'm sure there are other kids out there who have done it. Hopefully, he won't do it again. lol!

Charlene said...

I have no personal kid stories as never had children. The only being who thinks poop is play time are monkeys, I hear

As to what he might do next, talk to your mom and have her tell you about yourself at his age. Then multiply that by 10.

Mandy said...

Oh, honey. Three is soooo much worse than 2. They have their own minds and are NOT afraid to use them!

Trust me, much, much, much worse than 2 ever thought of being.

As I type this Molly is in the living room tearing up a box and shouting, "you're stupid" at it. Now she's telling Zach he's going to Time out NOW!

Oh goodness. *sighs and takes another sip of beer*

Dianne said...

my son loved to flush things down the toliet
he'd stand there and drop money or my lipstick or whatever and flush like a madman while screeching "Wheeeeeeeee"

it gets better, he's 37 now ;)

intomystic said...

Luckily, mine never painted with poop, but trust me, it's pretty common.

The Mountain Cat said...

Maybe he's the future Jackson Pollock?

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

umm nope never with poop...though my brother once painted with vaseline all over the walls of his room...that stuff is a b**ch to clean -