Friday, April 23, 2010

Hitting the High Notes 4/23/10

Stuff I have read in the news lately that I thought I would share:

-So you think you have a drinking problem? I know somebody who just might. Meet Laura Hall who at 20 has the distinction of being the first person ever banned from every bar and pub in all of England and Wales. Umm just my opinion but if your partying antics are so legendary that the police know about you and have to ban you from all bars in the whole country before you are even 21 you might need to seek some help.

-Everyone has heard of the Donner Party right? The folks who legend says resorted to cannibalism to stay alive during their move from Illinois to California during the harshest winter ever on record. Maybe that was just an Urban (or rural) legend all along says this article about research done at Appalachian State University in Boone, N.C.

-Here is an article about a recipe book that has Penguin publishers in Australia very embarrassed after a missed typo suggesting that a pasta dish required "salt and freshly ground black people" instead of freshly ground pepper. Umm hire a better proofreader guys.


-By now I bet most of you have heard about the guy in England who got arrested for DUI driving a pink Barbie kids car.

-One more mugshot for you... This is Julie Root a candidate for mother of the year who was arrested for child neglect when her sons were found outside playing in the rain wearing only their diapers. Umm Julie I think you heart the hippy lettuce just a little bit too much. Put down the ganja and TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS DAMMITT!!!!

-Last but not least you have to check out this article in which an Iranian cleric spells out exactly why there seem to be so many earthquakes recently. Promiscuous women of course. It's all you ladies fault (hee hee bad pun intended) that the earth is angry. Quit being such hoochies. Actually I was wondering if this was the case that bimbos cause earthquakes then why hasn't Hollywood fallen into the ocean yet?

Until next time keep reading the news!

-Doc

9 comments:

Schmoop said...

I dunno know. Mizz Root seems to have that vacuuous, demonic aura about her that I find damned attractive. Cheers Doc!!

Anonymous said...

Earthquakes are caused by sluts? Those Iranians are crazy.

Dianne said...

Pat Robertson is an Iranian cleric!?

Just me... said...

The thing that struck me was the locket she was wearing.. Like somehow wearing that made the crass (and nasty) t-shirt, the funky hair and raccoon-eye makeup all okay...
Stupid twit..
Substitute and 'a' for the 'i'.. Same diff..

Unknown said...

There is a group on Facebook now called "boobquake" they are urging women to wear their best cleavage revealing shirts this coming Monday to prove that it does not cause an earthquake...

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Nice. She should get "Mom of the Year"

terri said...

I love that the world is full of crazy people. How boring would life be without them?

Raquel's World said...

what's wrong with letting the kids play half nude outside in the rain?

Lifeofkaylen said...

Laura Hall's mother must be so proud.

I should apologize to the world for the sleeping around I did while in my 20's...I didn't realize it would have such an affect on the planet.