Wednesday, August 20, 2008

"Weird Al" Wednesday - August 20th

My cell phone busted yesterday so I had to buy a new one.

So to celebrate, Paul McCartney will sing a song for us replacing his lyrics to Hey Jude!

Sing it Paul!:

My cell phone,
It broke real bad,
But I bought a new Samsung,
That beats my old Motor-ooo-la.
Remember they aren’t built to last,
Then someday soon,
You’ll have to buy one better.

Russell Crowe,
Threw a phone at someone.
He said he’s sorry,
And was for-give-e-en.
I should have followed his lead,
And threw a cell phone,
At my ex-wife Heather.
Heather! Heather! Heather! Heather! Heather! Heather! (Mills) Ohhhh!!

Nah, nah, nah nah a nah nah, nah a nah nah, Cell Phones.

Ring, ring, ring, ring a ring ring, ring a ring ring, Cell Phones.

Chime, chime, chime chime a chime chime, chime a chime chime, Cell Phones.

Baby Got Back ring tone, Baby Got Back ring a ring tone, Cell Phones.

Enter Sandman ring tone, Enter Sandman ring a ring tone, Cell Phones.

Cell! Cell! Cell, Cell, Cell, Cell, Cell, Cell!! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

(Song Fade)

Yeah, I have serious issues, I know. Any other songs about cell phones? Happy Wednesday.

- The Mountain Cat

PS: Remember Gordon Gekko's cell phone circa 1988? >>>>


Doc said...

Adapted from the Police:


Doc said...

The Doors:

"Come on, come on, come on now TEXT me baby... you can see that I am not afraid. "

The Mountain Cat said...

Doc, ROTFL!!!! That's a deep track.

How about instead of 'Sending out an SOS'....

Sending out a cell phone text
Sending out a cell phone text
Sending out a cell phone text
Sending out a cell phone text
(21 more times)

leapofaith said...

Ring My Bell by Anita Ward...

I'm glad you're home
Well, did you really miss me?
I guess you did by the look in your eye (look in your eye, look in your eye)
Well lay back and relax while I find a new ring tone
Then you and me can ring my cell

You can ring my ce-e-ell, ring my cell...ding, dong, ding, ah-ah, ring it!

leapofaith said...

Text if you need to text
Ring if you need to ring
Text if you need to text
Ring if you need to ring

Text if you need to text
Ring if you need to ring
Text if you need to text
Ring if you need to ring

The Mountain Cat said...

Horse with No Name by America.

Well I've been through the desert on my Blackbery Pearl, It feels good to check in with my boss. In the desert, I can't remember my ID. My password has to be reset. La la, la, la la la la. La la, la, la.

leapofaith said...

Tone-Loc, Wild Thing

Workin' all week 9 to 5 for my money
So when the weekend comes I can get calls from the honey
Got a call from this girl, I saw her and she was pumpin'
I winked my eye she got into the ride went to a club was jumpin'
Introduce myself as Loc she said "You're a liar"
I said "I got it goin' on baby doll and I'm on fire"
Took her to the hotel she said "You're the king"
I said "Be my queen if you know what I mean and always make my cell phone ring

Doc said...

HA! thats a good one Vin....

I figured you would like that Police cut.

Leap O' I felt sure that you could come up with some John Mayer.

leapofaith said...

The Troggs, Wild Thing

Wild Thing
You make my cell ring
You make everything vibrate
Wild Thing

Wild Thing, I think you texted me
But, I wanna know for sure
So, c'mon and ring my cell
Please ring me

leapofaith said...

Doc, somebody's gotta do it...! ; )

The Mountain Cat said...

AC/DC - Shook Me All Night Long

She has a fast machine
She kept her Motorola clean
It was the best damn cell phone I had ever seen
with widescreen eyes
I'm not tellin' lies
Knockin' me out with those mega-pix-els
Taking more of my minutes
Had me fighting my limits
She told me to text but I couldn't go there

'Cause my pocket start shaking
The pants was quaking
My mind was aching
And I'm losing money because of you -

My cell phone vibrates all night long.
Please stop text-ing me.
My cell phone vibrates all night long.
I have no more free minutes left.

Doc said...


"I was working part time at the five-and dime, my boss was Mr. McGee.
He told me several times that he didn't like my style because I was always texting and being lazy.
It seems that I was busy texting something close to nothing but different than the day before.
Thats when I saw it (ooooh I saw it) when she came through the out door. (out door)

She had a Blackberry Curve (a)
The kind you buy of Eeeeee-bay
It was a blackberry Curve (a)
I new I had to have one today!"

leapofaith said...

LOL at both of you!!

(Are we the only ones playin'??)

Doc said...

Boogie Shoes by KC and the Sunshine Band:

"I got have my-my-my-my-my
My Bluetooth"

The Mountain Cat said...

The Rising - Bruce Springsteen

Come on up, buy Verizon.
Come on up, get a wireless devise.
Come on up, buy Verizon.
Come on up it will even work on your subway ride.

Li,li, li,li,li,li, li,li,li

leapofaith said...

I hate to break up this menage a trois, but I gotta go eat my salad. Hold it down, boyz!! ; )

The Mountain Cat said...

Pearl Jam -

Jeremy spoke on, a Bbblllaaaccckkkberryyyyyyy.

Clearly I remember, texting with the boy. Seemed, a harmless little fuck. Owwww but we released a mountain lion! Smashed his phone and bit the outsource customer service technician lady's breast. How can I forget?

The Mountain Cat said...

Madonna -

Papa, Don't text. My minutes are over me. Papa, Don't text. I need a new plan baby.

The Mountain Cat said...

Kelis -

My Sidekick rings better than yours. Damn right, rings better than yours.

The Mountain Cat said...

Piano Man - Billy Joel

Sing us a song you're a megatone! Sing us a song tonight. We're all in the mood for digital parody. And you make me feel alright.

Doc, since this is your favorite song to parody, do you want to add to the verses?

leapofaith said...

LMAOROTFL, Vin!! All I can picture is Peter...LOLOL!!!!

The Mountain Cat said...

Genesis -

Don't say you called me Mama! Cause there is nothing on my caller ID. OHHHHHHHH!!!! HAHA! HA!...HAHA! HA! OWWWW!

Doc said...

Phil Collins:

"Billy... Billy don't you lose my cell number
Cause you not anywhere where I can't text you."

Karen said...

Oh my goodness....that Pearl Jam one just killed me. You 3 are on fire.

Doc said...


"Everybody texts.... sometimes"


"Moses want walking with the staff of Ra (yeah yeah yeah yeah)
Newton got beaned by the apple core (yeah yeah yeah yeah)
Egypt was troubled by the horrible asp (yeah yeah yeah yeah)
Apple dropped the price of the I-phone"

(you might have to think for that last one but trust me it's brilliant)

WNG said...

You guys are killing today! I don't even know if I can come up with anything but...I'll be back!

WNG said...

Ok - Carole King, Smackwater Jack:
Now Smackwater Jack, he bought a cell phone
'Cause he was in the mood for a little communication
He just let it all hang loose
He didn't think about the bluetooth
He couldn't take no more abuse
So he called out the congregation

You can't talk to a man
With a bluetooth in his ear

Now Big Jim the chief stood for law and call plans
He called for the guard to come and surround the tower
Now from his speakerphone’s mouth
As he led the posse south
Came the cry, we got to ride
Clean up the air waves for our wives and our daughters

You can't talk to a man
When he don't want to understand
No, no, no, no, no, no

The account of the capture wasn't in the papers
But you know, they hang up on ole Smack right then instead of later
You know the people were quite pleased
'Cause the hands free device had been seized
And on the whole, it was a very good year
For the Verizon salesman

You know, you know, you can't talk to a man
With a bluetooth in his ear
bluetooth in his ear

Smackwater Jack, yeah
Smackwater Jack bought a cell phone
Yeah, Smackwater Jack bought a cell phone
Smackwater Jack, yeah
Smackwater Jack, yeah

The Mountain Cat said...

The Clash -

Darling you gotta let me know
Should I text or should I call?
If you call that you are mine
I'll pick up before the end of the chime
So you got to let know
Should I text or should I call?

The Mountain Cat said...

Cool WNG is getting deeptrack on us. lol

Doc said...


"Early in the morning,
Rising to the street
Texting up my BFF
then reading up on YJKOBT

I got a 14 month old
He's got his own phone
to tell you the truth he's really got 6
And he is not alone...

Kids today all got cells
Like they don't even try it
All those little punk love to text
like a M***** F***** riot"

The Mountain Cat said...

Wham! - Careless Whispers

I'm never gonna text again.
Guilty fingers have got no ABC mode.
I'm never gonna text again. The way I texted with you-oooh-oooh.

The Mountain Cat said...

***I added a photo of Michael Doglas from Wall Street to the bottom of the intial blog for a laugh. hee hee.

WNG said...

That was awesome, Doc, sublime ;)

WNG said...

Crosstown Traffic - Hendrix

You talk on your cell in my car when you,
you know all the time
Hands free, girl, is the speed I drive
You tell me it's alright, you don't mind a little pain
You say you just want me to call or text today

You're just like busy circuits
So hard to get through to you
Busy circuits
I don't need to run over you
busy circuits
All you do is slow me down
And I'm tryin' to get the new faster iPhone,

Doc said...

Nice one G! I love The Experience.

Hey Vin, those old cell phones like the one from Wall street used to charge like .99 a minute... no unlimited free talk... and the reception sucked. I guess the only thing that has changed is the prices.

WNG said...

Dave Matthews (in honor of LeRoi)

When you dig my grave
could you make it shallow
So that I can get cell service

Doc said...


"You can choose to use your phone with some incessant voice,
You can choose to text or not;
You still have made a choice
I can choose from numerous calls with kindness never fail,
I will choose to iggy your call and send you to voice-mail"

WNG said...

Digable Planets - Where I'm From

bluetooth jive and cells is life where i'm from
where i'm from i might play with iPhones where i'm from
where i'm from it be like text you fingers black
jupiter keeps the fat beats by the pack where i'm from
GPS is life we be reading email on our cells where i'm from

The Mountain Cat said...

Alanis Morisette - Hand in Pocket

I text cause I'm happy.
I'm poor, my plan is unkind.
I'm short when I call you, yeah
I text because it's fun,
Doc doesn't because he's chickenshit.

***I can't think of anything else**

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine...Well I got a cell phone in my pocket and my other hand is giving you the middle finger.

WNG said...

James Morrison - Wonderful World

I've had such a bad phone
People look at me and they know
They can tell something is wrong
Like I don't belong

Staring through a window
Standing outside, I can buy the iPhone tonight
I want to be like them
But I'll mess it up again

I tripped on my way in
And got kicked outside, everybody saw...

And I know that it's a wonderful phone
But I can't feel it right now
Well I thought that I could text and talk
But I just want to cry now
Well I know that it's a wonderful phone
From the touch pad down to the battery
But I can only hear it ring when you're here, here with me

WNG said...

This is for Doc...

heard there was a secret tone
that david played on his cell phone
but you don't really care for ringtones, do you
well it goes like this the fourth, the fifth
the minor fall and the major lift
the baffled king composing on his cell phone

on his cell phone...

Doc said...

LOL @ TMC and G.... Ya'll know me so well !!

Hammer said...

Better copyright that song before weird al steals it :)

Sis Chris said...

This is the freak'in funniest blog stuff I have read in a long time! ROTFLMAO!!!!! Too great - I just can't participate...

leapofaith said...

Naked Eyes

I walk along the city streets you used to walk along with me,
and every step I take reminds me of just how we used to be.
Well, how can I forget you, girl?
When you always ring my cell to remind me...always some text there to remind me.

The Mountain Cat said...

Sis Chris,

This one is for you:

Texting by train, high on cocaine. My cell phone message is to buy more speed.
Trouble ahead, trouble behind. And I sold your iPhone to buy more di-i-ime (dime bags that is).

Casey Jones - The Grateful Dead

Ahh not to suggest my sister buys drugs, but she's a big Grateful Dead fan. - Love, TMC

WNG said...

You guys are a great hangover cure - you should market yourselves

The Mountain Cat said...

Thanks Whole New G! Oh and did Doc tell you I accidently called you WGN when he was in NY? Oops. You're not a Chicago cable station are you? LOL.

leapofaith said...

LMAO, TMC! <:8)

Sis Chris said...

I suppose I can admit to still liking the Dead. But I don't much listen to them these days. Bob Weir has some new music that I like. And of course, me no do drugs.

Thanks for the late day laughs. this is all hilarious!

leapofaith said...


The Mountain Cat said...

You are my cell phone,
My only cell phone.
You make me happy,
This blog is gay!
(The happy kind of gay, that is).

The Mountain Cat said...

Its been one week since you texted with me
Cocked your head to the side and said you're busy.
Five days since you texted back at me.
Saying get that together call me back and see me.

Chickity china the chinese chicken


The Mountain Cat said...

Sister Christian,
Your cell has rung.
And you know that you're the only one..

You're motorola!
What's your price for five..
hundred minutes seems right.
I need a phone tonight.

Doc said...

Red Hot Chili Peppers

"Under the bridge down town the reception sucks
Under the bridge down town I just had had enough
Under the bridge down town I cursed at Sprint today
Under the bridge down town, I threw my phone away-y-y-y-y-y YaY-Yeah"

The Mountain Cat said...


Lightning crashes,
The phone tower's dark.
Her cell phone falls to the floor.


Doc said...


"I used to hurry a lot
I used to worry a lot
I used to talk on my cell all day

Oh that didn't get it
Was high time I quit it
I just couldn't carry on that way

Oh my bill showed the damage you know it's true
I was scared they would cut my phone off and keep me from you

Who can go the distance?
We'll find out if it's Verizon. (Verizon)
if they can come up with a bajillion minute plan we will know
They are the right one... (the right one)"

Doc said...

Bon Jovi:

"Shot through the heart
And you're to blame
T.Mobils's service
Is super lame"

Micky-T said...

You guys kicked holy ass today.....

I bow with my face on the ground to you...So fricken funny!!!!

leapofaith said...


Peeps...words cannot describe how funny the Cat is in person. I'm gonna install a nanny-cam at his desk somewhere so I can share with you all!! He just cracked me the f@#$ up!! He's soooo excited about his new cell phone! It's red 'n shiny...

leapofaith said...

LMAO at Doc!!

It's on fire today....!!!!

The Mountain Cat said...

On a dark desert highway,
cell phone in my hand.
Warm smell of grande soy chai lattes, rising up through the air....

Welcome to the Hotel California

Nah I can't think of anything....

Doc said...


"I get up about seven
Get outta bed around nine
by then I have sent 200 text messages
'Cause talking's a waste of my....time

I've been texting with Mr. Cell Phone
He's addicting.. I've got a blistered thumb"

The Mountain Cat said...


Load up on calls,
Save your friends
Its fun to have your fav five
And I phone a friend
She's over bored
Myself minutes assured
I text I text
A dirty word

cell phone, cell phone, cell phone, cell phones.
cell phone, cell phone, cell phone, cell phones.
cell phone, cell phone, cell phone, cell phones.
cell phone, cell phone, cell phone, cell phones.

With the lights out, its on vibrate
Here we are now
Photograph us
I feel stupid without my Sidekick
Here we are now
Photograph us

A Samsung!
And an iPhone!
A Razor!
My Nokia!

WNG said...

Ok, you are forgiven for the WGN comment because of the soy chai latte reference...yumm...

Mt Cat & Doc: The Cure For What Ails Ya!

The Mountain Cat said...

This next one is for Doc, Dirkstar and all you Frank Zappa fans out there:

I'm gonna text it, text it, text it, text up your cell phone.

*fist typing*

I'm gonna text it, text it, text it, text up your cell phone.

*wrist flick. photo attachment*

Don't fool yourself girl, it's going right to your cell phone.

Don't fool yourself girl, it's going right to your cell phone.

yi, yi, yi, yi, yi.

I knew you'd be surprised!

As American as Apple Pie said...

You guys all had me and Apple Hubby LOAO tonight. We can't even begin to compete.

jennifer said...

The Beatles - Do you want to know a secret...

Listen. Do you want to hear my Rumor.
Do you know that it's a Cell?
Ringtone. I want it to be Veggies.
As in the Veggie Taaaa-ales.
You can call me too.

You can call me after 7.
When it doesn't cost me.

jennifer said...

White Stripes Doorbell

I been thinkin' bout my cell phone
When you gonna call it
When you gonna call it
I been thinkin 'bout my cell phone
When you gonna Call it?

jennifer said...

Violent Femmes Blister in the Sun

Let me run on like a cell phone that's on roam
Let me run on Verizon you know your the one.

Short and sweet tonight. Thinking cap is on the blink.

Sassy Mama Bear said...

Did you have to do that to Hey Jude?

I Wanna ring your Phone,
Simply ring your phone
I Wanna Make it vibrate
at the worst time possible
I wanna ring your phone!