Monday, February 18, 2008

1-800-62 (everyone please re-listen)

U P D A T E - I am sorry I previously linked the wrong Audio... Now both are linked - Please listen to Part One - It should make more sense now.... Sorry

Today you guys get a little bit of a treat. What we have today is a piece of the past. A little audio from 1994 that I hope that you will find hilarious. Ok here is the set up. My first job out of college was a claims investigator with an insurance company who insured drivers who had problem driving records. During my time there I found that dealing with many of these people was difficult and actually comical at times. I began to document some of these conversations and situations that I had. The following audio is actually me attempting to give my phone # to two different people trying to have the person involved in the accident call me back. I am just trying to give a simple phone # and that's where it all goes awry. My good buddy Mt. Cat has been nice enough to transcribe the conversation as well. Stick with it because even though it is a little bit long it is hilarious. Oh yes and what you are about to hear is 100% real and unscripted. Enjoy, we call this 1-800-62. Part 1 The audio starts after I have tried 3 times to give this old man my 1-800 number. Let me know what you think:

PLEASE CLICK HERE FOR PART ONE AUDIO - I am sorry I had the wrong audio linked before



SHANE: It’s, it’s 1-800-642…not six four three.

OLD MAN: Uhhuh, you said four two?

SHANE: Yes six four two.


SHANE: You got it?

OLD MAN: Wait just a minute…6….fo….six four two.

SHANE: Yes sir.

OLD MAN: Ok…I to have him call you.

SHANE: Ok hold up hold up. It’s 1-800-642-0506.

OLD MAN: Uh…is this some kind of business or somthin’?

SHANE: I’m his insurance company.

OLD MAN: What kinda place is this?

SHANE: This, I’m the person who is investigating the accident he was involved in.

OLD MAN: Uh-huh.

SHANE: ‘k…I’m not, I need to, I to get give you the full number so he can call me…It’s a (half laughing) free call.

OLD MAN: Wait just a minute (---walks away---) Freddie, come here…..I thought……(---comes back to the phone---) I thought that was him out there but it wasn’t.

SHANE: Ok…well how much of the number do you have down so far?


SHANE: The, the phone number how much do you have written down?

OLD MAN: I got 1-800-62.



SHANE: Ok…It’s…(Half laughing) start all over.


SHANE: Lemme give you the number again.

OLD MAN: 1-800,

SHANE: six four,

OLD MAN: six,

SHANE: four two,

OLD MAN: Yeah.

SHANE: zero five,

OLD MAN: Wait a minute…..Zero…five, yeah?

SHANE: And then zero six.

OLD MAN: Zero six.

SHANE: After the zero five …..(Half laughing) And there’s more.


SHANE: (half laughing) and then there’s more…. I have an extension number.

OLD MAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: The extension is three nine….

OLD MAN: Yeah.

SHANE: three three….

OLD MAN: Yeah?

SHANE: Now read me what you got.

OLD MAN: 1-800-62…

SHANE: No it’s six four two…..

OLD MAN: Six…no I ain’t talking about, I’m talking about just a straight number?

SHANE: Right.

OLD MAN: Oh, 1-800...six…two.

SHANE: No it’s six four two, sir.

OLD MAN: (feeble) Huh?

SHANE: It’s it’s 1-800-642-0506 and then the extension number. I don’t know where you are getting the six two after the 1-800.

OLD MAN: I got 1-800- but I...and ah…six, six two…..and you say?

SHANE: No it’s six four two.

OLD MAN: Six…..le uh, let her get this I can’t understand that! (Trails away)


SHANE: Ma’am?

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh?

SHANE: Can you talk down a number and have uh Fredrick call me back?

OLD WOMAN: What’s this number?

SHANE: 1-800,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: Six four two,

OLD WOMAN: Six four two.

SHANE: Oh five,


SHANE: Zero five!

OLD WOMAN: Oh five.

SHANE: And then oh six.

OLD WOMAN: Oh six?

SHANE: Let me read it to ya.

OLD WOMAN: Wait now, I’ve got 800, 1-800-six four two, five oh five.

SHANE: No, it’s not just zero five, not oh five…six four two,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: Zero fiv,

OLD WOMAN: Zero fiv, uh, oh? Not, not 800?

SHANE: Yeah it’s 1-800,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: six four two,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: Zero five,

OLD WOMAN: Zero five.

SHANE: Zero six.

OLD WOMAN: Zero...six.

SHANE: And my extension number,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: Is three nine three three…

OLD WOMAN: Six three nine, what?

SHANE: Three three.

OLD WOMAN: Three three, ok.

SHANE: Read it back to me one mor, one time just to make sure I got it.

OLD WOMAN: eh you have uh uh, six four two, five oh, six oh.

SHANE: No it’s oh five oh six.

OLD WOMAN: (laugh) It’s oh five oh six! Oh my goodness let me start all over! Six four,

SHANE: (half laugh) That’s 1-800 six four two

OLD WOMAN: Oh…oh five, oh six


OLD WOMAN: Oh six, extension three nine three…

SHANE: Three.


SHANE: Now let me read it to you one time to make sure we got.

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: 1-800,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: six four two,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.
SHANE: Zero five zero six,

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

SHANE: Extension three nine three three.

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh, awhoaw.

SHANE: Ok, have Fred, and my name is Shane by the way.




SHANE: Have, have,

OLD WOMAN: S H what?


OLD WOMAN: S, H, A, N, E. Ok.

SHANE: Have Fredrick call me as soon as he gets in.


SHANE: Thank you.

OLD WOMAN: Uh huh.

*click* *dial tone*

SHANE: You gotta be kidding me? (laugh)



Anonymous said...

Ya know Doc? To keep from talking to them again, I think I would just say, hey here is your claim money or whatever I have to do to keep from having to call them again!!

I would be so frustrated and a complete mess! I don't want to get OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!!!


Anonymous said...

He really thought it was not his fault, Bless his heart! I would hunt him down if he done something like that and made me wreck my car.. Okay back to the sweet lil me again!! LOL

Doc said...

Single - Well that is just part1 - I also have the audio of when "Fredrick" calls me back later to explain about the accident. I will post that some other day...but once you hear that you will really see why I couldn't take that job anymore.

Doc said...

BTW- Mt. Cat and I tried several times this weekend to upload that audio to U-tube with no sucess. If anyone knows how we can convert that audio to a format I can upload to you tube...please let me know. e-mail me or something.


Matt-Man said...

Real llife stupid is so damn funny. Cheers!!

The Mama Bear said...

This was my job as a Customer Service Rep for the catalog company, every call seemed this way.
You had to laugh or you would strange the person in the next cubicle with your headset cord to break the monotony of it all.

So, the million dollar question....did he ever call back?

Doc said...

I agree Matt-Man....

and yeah Penelope Fredrick called back and I have that audio too... Will post that at a later date.

The Mountain Cat said...

Classic! One of the funniest things I've ever heard!

Jay said...

No way I could be patient enough to deal with people like that. It's hilarious cause it was you and not me on that phone. haha

Karen said...

I would have hung up on him. You are much more patient than I am. Either that or I would have been laughing so hard I could not talk.

Doc said...

Jay & Karen- I wasn't really all that patient but the whole time I was thinking to myself that I am recording this to SHOW everyone how ridiculous the people I have to deal with are... You can actually hear me laugh a couple of times in there... LOL!

Real Live Lesbian said...

Your degree of patience is amazing. You must have taken my part. I have ZERO! I would have had to strangle him!


Leighann said...

This is a prime example of why I can't stand people OR talking on the phone! ;)

Micky-T said...

Whatn no uder car bahind me at first!
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

Dang! Did you look before you took a left from the right?

I'll quote Matt-man,
"real life stupid"

Dana said...

Having spent several years on a tech support line (in a previous life) I've learned that people really are this stupid!

Doc said...

CRAP - I just realized that I linked the wrong audio the first time.... PLEASE go back and listen to the audio marked Part one.....

Tink said...

LMAO! That was unbelievable. You have the patient of a saint.

Oh man... I'm STILL laughing.

Jahooni said...

post was TOO long I didn't read it... guess I should go back and do that before making a comment or maybe not. Guess i'll move on along.

DirkStar said...

Every time I try to listen it bogs down my computer and all I get is an error message.

It read kinda funny though...

Becky said...

Oh my, I think my head just exploded. That's gonna leave a stain.