Do you know what... you aren't real. You are a tall tale, a story, a legend like Sasquatch, Chupacabra, or the Loch Ness Monster. You don't exist. You are fake. You simply aren't real.Or at least so says my wife. (and backed up by my sister, parents, and others on Mother's Day) You see for a long time my wife has held the belief that the people I have "met" and become friendly with on the internet via blogging and more recently Twitter aren't real people. She claims that all those text message tweets that I receive don't "count" because I am not getting them from "real people" like those who text her or Facebook people who are actually real.
Now I will admit that other than friends that I had prior to blogging/tweeting I have yet to actually meet any of you in person but that simply doesn't make you any less real. Each of you is real and has feelings, opinions, and emotions and over time I have come to know you by reading your postings and comments. I think that I have come to know some of you so well that I can even predict how you will react to a blog posting or a tweet and what your leaning will be on a news stories. That's not to say that I wouldn't like to meet you all. As a matter of fact I wish that I could host a big party and all of my blogging/tweeting friends could come. I think we would have a great time. Of course no one would actually show up because you all aren't real.
I would love to hear what you all think of this. What is your opinion? How do you like being portrayed as not real? Does anyone else either feel the same or have a family member who thinks their "internet friends" aren't real? Heck am I the only one who sometimes prefers the company of my twitter friends to real people? I really want to read your comments on this one. Of course since you aren't real are the comments really there? (And if Nessie the Loch Ness Monster comments then my wife will really think its a conspiracy)
-Doc
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34 comments:
I don't know about anyone else, but I'm just a blow up doll full of air.
My husband says pretty much the same thing. And he just can't fathom how I could be "friends" with anyone on facebook that I don't "know."
Well since, clearly, I knew you in real life way before twitter and blogs I guess I am real...or am I? Lol. But, seriously, I think online friends are just as real and sometimes are better friends, as someone is always there! Its also easier to be honest thru the computer screen.
I love having online friends. They are all very real friendships to me. I wish we could have a big 'ol party, that would be awesome!
Great post!
I could send her a picture of my beer gut and an X-Ray of my right lung when I had pneumonia last Octber to prove I'm real if that'll help.
And remind her...Where did the BBQ chips come from, The Grippo's Fairy? Cheers Doc!!
You caught me! I'm really a 57 year old man with a lot of chest hair.
In all seriousness, I met some pretty awesome friends on-line and now we're even better friends in person.
So, you know, take that as you will
Candice - Blow up doll? Tell me more... LOL
Paige - Crazy huh?
Mandy - Yeah, you are clearly real... or are you fake because I knew you so long ago?
Matt - I think you are referred to as the "Grippo Fairy" Not the most flattering term but damn tasty!
Kimmeh - You are a pretty good example of someone who has met others from online... (and not been hacked to death by an axe murderer)
That is funny Matt-Man! And like Mandy I have known you from “Back n the Day” as they say here in redneck hell. I do however know what your wife means. I only read your blog Doc because I know you. The twitter thing I don’t get and frankly don’t know how you have time for that?! On Facebook I am only friends with people I know and have meet. I think your wife just thinks you are weird!!!
Belle - Well I am weird, but that is besides the point...
My family doesn't even know about my online friends, b/c they wouldn't understand, and would probably laugh at the idea. I much prefer my blog/twitter friends to my "real" ones. If I ever lose internet access I'll go crazy, lol.
That makes me wonder what she thinks of the whole WG thing...
If we are all imaginary then you should be writing a book or seeing some serious psychiatric treatment for multipersonality disorder. There is that fine line between genius and insanity.
I see your wife's point. There are only a handful of my online friends who I consider my real friends - a few I have met and a few I haven't yet. Most of those people are also my facebook friends.
For me there is a part of friendship that requires face to face or other real life contact. But nonetheless, my online relationships are very important to me. They are just different than my real friendships.
I wonder if this "real" thought process has anything to do with temperament. What I mean is that I have never really had a lot of "real" friends - people I see frequently - people I share details of my life with. I'm an introvert by nature and my anxiety SKYROCKETS when I'm around "real" people.
Enter in blogging and twitter and I have the opportunity to be a social butterfly. For me, "real" people see me first, then get to know me, and they often make judgments based on my appearance.
My "imaginary" friends get to know me first, then see me - a process I am much more comfortable with. *shrugs*
I can tell you this, I don't know where I would be without all of you. Maybe you are "imaginary" but y'all have been a very REAL support in my life.
Mrs D. - I am with you... non "real" freiends are the best.
Chick - Oh don't get her started on WG... please!
Karen - Are you real because you met the Mt. Cat?
Dana - Come to think of it you met Apple... You might be real too!
I don't really distinguish between online friends and real life friends. Everyone is real to me.
And, any of the ladies who want to prove they're real they can send me naked pics. ;-)
Jay - Let me know if anyone takes you up on that offer... lol
Mrs D. I feel sorry for you if that is the real case and sorry for any of your real friends if you do feel that way.
Doc the same goes for you if you truly agree with that!
Oh it is just so much better looking at a computer or a cell phone....Oh and to give it a hug! Nothing like something flat, cold (or maybe hot from being pluged in to long)and can't hug you back.
I know you can't hear me, so I must NOT be real. Really!
Well, outside of a small group of family and friends, I would say that my online friends know me better than anyone else. That's real to me.
Belle - I hug my cellphone all the time...
Micy-T - We share a family name and I have talked to you on the phone before... does that make you real??
Jetsa - I can agree with that. I don't have a "huge" bunch of friends here where I live now and mt best freinds live in NY and Fla so yes a lot of "non-real internet people" know me pretty well.
I wish I never met half the people I've met already! LOL
Mt. Cat- Heck we met in Harris Teeter break room.. Twitter is much more exciting than that.
I get this all the time from my hubby and IRL friends. They don't understand the comunity that blogging and twitter is. I don't have many friends who have kids so my blog mommies have become my closest mommy friends. I even met up with a bunch of my twitter/blogging mommies last week. It was THE. MOST. FUN. EVER!
When you learn how to convince your wife that we on the web are real please let me know so I can convince hubby as well. #kthanxbye
I might be the odd one out, but to me the only difference between IRL friends and online friends is the way you communicate.. Phone, email, blog, tweet, letter/card, Skype, whatever..
However, the preceived 'anonymity' of the internet might make me little more likely to express myself openly.. Or maybe not.. :)
Monkey's Mom - You will be the second to know once I figure it out.
Me - I understand completely
I've met lots of online friends in person and it's always fun. In fact, a fellow blogger and friend is coming to visit us tomorrow. :-)
This is Doc's wife. I'd like to clarify something. The texts that I am referring to are from CNN, Sports Illustrated, etc. Those are news sources, not actual people.
I run into this problem quite frequently actually. My brother is constantly trying to get me out of the house to hang with him and "real" people. Problem is that I don't much like his idea of real people and in the area of the country I live in I am an oddity...a raving liberal in an extremely redneck conservative area...so I don't often meet people I get along with. I also find that some people just don't get the online world. We are just wired differently I guess. The people I talk to are real, the woman I love is real and the world I hang out in is real. They have feelings, they have lives, they have families and they know I do. We fight, laugh, talk, share and just generally converse. Just because we cannot share a beer in the same location does not make them (or me) less real. Reality is often perspective. Great post.
I thought I saw a chupacabra the other day on the side of the road when I was running errands. No lie. I saw it out of the corner of my eye. And since I live on the border of Mexico, it isn't a stretch that I saw one. :-0
After reading the post that I wrote today, I guess you know how I feel about this :) Kristin and I had so much fun together today. We don't get to see each other very often (today was the third time in the history of our friendship) but she means the world to me.
I think that people can be a bit more open with their thoughts and feelings on the internet (the anonymity thing). It gives us the opportunity to cut through some of the fakey fake crap and get to know each other quicker.
The 'friends that live in my computer' are definitely real and very important to me. Thanks for being one of them Doc.
But how do know it was ME on the other end of the phone? just saying
I sometimes feel like my blogging friends are some of the first "real" friends I've ever had. There's something about writing on our blogs that allows us to be more open, more sincere and more vulnerable than we are in "real" life. At least, that's true for me.
I got really behind in my blogging/reading this week and realized as I started trying to catch up today, how very much I would miss these people if they weren't a part of my everyday life.
Tell your wife I'm sorry, but she's wrong :-)
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