Tuesday Word Game 4/8

This week for Tuesday word game we head back to the sports world. It's been awhile since we last saw Michael Vick... Let's see what he is up to ladies and gents. Oh that's right, he is in federal prison on dogfighting charges and guess what he is doing there instead of paying for his crimes? He is playing football of course.

It seems that Vick has been writing letters to Atlanta Falcons owner Arthur Blank during his incarceration. In those letters he says that he is the first round draft pick in the penal league football team. Isn't that nice?

Let's take this opportunity to explore the world of Mike Vick in prison. Fill in the the blank in the real news story below with a funny and fictitious activity that Vick is participating in to fill the time while he is in prison. Knitting perhaps? Writing a physics textbook? Who knows, maybe he is spending his time playing Pokemon? You decide and answer in a comment:

When they choose sides for football games in the yard at the United States Penitentiary in Leavenworth, Kan., Michael Vick is the popular pick.
Twice for the same game, it seems.
In an interview with the New York Daily News posted on their Web site on Monday, Atlanta Falcons owner Arthur Blank said Vick is playing ball in prison to keep his body in shape, his arm limber and to pass the time.
"Apparently, there was a prison football team and he played quarterback for both sides," Blank told the Daily News.

Blank also said that Vick has taken up a new hobby in prison and is passing his time by ______________________ .

Please answer as often as you like and of course the best answer gets a Peach!

-Doc

Tuesday Word Game 4/1

It's Tuesday Word game time here at YJKOBT !! That special time of the week when we take a current news story and add our own twist on it. Rumor has it that Mt. Cat tried to steal my peaches last week. Just to let you know he blamed it on my "fans." Well shame on Ya'll ;-) Well I am back this week and ready to roll with this sickening article. Give it a read below (I wish it was an April Fools Joke)

BELLEVUE, Ohio -- Police said an Ohio man has been arrested for allegedly having sex with a picnic table.
Police arrested Arthur Price Jr. after an anonymous tipster dropped off three DVDs that reportedly showed Price in the act.
According to NBC Toledo, Ohio, affiliate WNWO-TV, the videos show Price tilting the metal round picnic table on its side and then laying up against it to have sexual intercourse with the table. Afterward, he can then be seen cleaning the table and the deck.

During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to ________________________ .

YIKES I have no idea where this guy got his fetish but I am wondering why it took the neighbors 3 times of filming him to turn him in. - Leave a comment with something else this pervert may have admitted to doing and the funniest wins a peach. Enter as often as you wish.

-Doc

Tuesday's Word Game Winner

In honor of my partner D.O.C. M.I.A. A.W.O.L., I have created a special award this week for our Tuesday's Word Game winner for best play on Heathers Mills' 'plight'.

This week's winner is Anndi who wrote:

" I'll be going to America where people are prepared to hear me spill... OWWWWWWWW my leg!!!" **a masked man runs in - probably Jeff Gillooly- and smacks her on the 'good leg' leaving poor Miss Heather without a leg to stand on.**


Anndi it was the part about Jeff Gillooly that put you over the top. He has always had much affinity in the hearts of Doc and I. We've been making jokes about him for years!

So Anndi, please come pick up your award:

Congratulations Anndi!

Please visit Anndi's blog page at: http://anndisluggage.blogspot.com/.

- The Mountain Cat

Tuesday's Word Game with The Mountain Cat

While the Doc is away, the Cat will play. I was going to skip this week's word game but this story is just too juicy for you pop culture enthusiasts to pass up.

As you should all know by now, Heather Mills was awarded, in her opinion, a measly $48.7 million in her divorce settlement with Sir Paul McCartney. But now she is…*ahem*…hopping mad and wants to enact revenge on Sir Paul, his lawyer and the judge of their case.

The story goes on to say that "She's full of hate and vitriol and feels nothing but spite towards everyone on the other side. She vowed,' They're all going to regret what they did to me. I have tapes of Paul crying (over the death of first wife Linda McCartney), and they prove what a drug addict and alcoholic he was. I WILL make them public.'" (Click here for the full story).

In my humble opinion, it is a shame that she has...*double ahem*...pegged Sir Paul with such animosity when $48.7 million is well more money than any of us can ever dream of seeing.

Now folks I want you to think of a funny and creative way to complete the following quote from Heather Mills: "I know I'm a target now and I'm in danger but I don't care. I'll go after Paul again if I have to. I should have had more money and it's because Paul hid it from the court that I got so little. I'll be going to America where people are prepared to hear______________."

The comment with the most creativity wins a very special award from me....ready???.....Go!

- The Mountain Cat

Tuesday Word Game 3/18

For this weeks Tuesday word game we head to the world of clothing fashion. Well sort of anyway. It seems that the Florida State legislature has an issue with droopy pants. According to this article the State Senate wants to suspend students for wearing "droopy britches." Since they are sticking their noses into the world of fashion (as if falling down pants is the biggest problem facing the State of Florida) I figured they might also go further.... For today's word game please fill in the blank in the following news article with another fashion trend the Florida legislature should seek to ban. The best answer of course wins a Peach!

TALLAHASSEE, Florida (Reuters) - The Florida Senate wants public school students to pull up their pants. Lawmakers passed a bill Thursday that could mean suspensions for students with droopy britches.

Florida could join several southern U.S. towns and cities that have passed "saggy pants" laws aimed at outlawing what some teenagers consider a fashion statement -- wearing pants half way down their buttocks, exposing flesh or underwear.

In another move aimed at controlling the way it's citizen's dress the state Senate has also decided to ban _____________________.

-Doc

Tuesday Word Game 3/11

We go religious in this weeks word game. I thought about using the Eliot Spitzer but figured that was too easy. This story is about the Catholic church unveiling "new" sins yesterday including using mind altering drugs, genetic manipulation, and not taking care of the environment. We here at YJKOBT think there are some other trivial "sins" out there that the Pope could have brought up and it's you job to point them out. Complete the news article below with a witty (and obviously false) sin that the church should have called out yesterday. Best answer wins the Peach!

VATICAN CITY --In olden days, the deadly sins included lust, gluttony and greed. Now, the Catholic Church says pollution, mind-damaging drugs and genetic experiments are on its updated thou-shalt-not list. Also receiving fresh attention by the Vatican was social injustice, along the lines of the age-old maxim: "The rich get richer while the poor get poorer."
In the Vatican's latest update on how God's law is being violated in today's world, Monsignor Gianfranco Girotti advised that the church is going to recognize _________________ as a big no-no.

-Doc

(My first idea was that murder of a coffee maker is a big no-no... even a spitting one)

Tuesday Word Game - 3/4

This weeks word game comes to us from the realm of academia. It seems that Notre Dame is giving Martin Sheen some sort of medal for his charity work. While I am sure that it is well deserved it's really not all that funny so I decided that we should juice it up a bit. As usual just add something false and funny to this real news article below. Please fill in the blanks (yes two of them this week) with a name and then the reason. Of course the one that makes me laugh the most wins a peach. Here goes:

SOUTH BEND, Ind. - Activist-actor Martin Sheen will be honored by the University of Notre Dame with its Laetare Medal for his humanitarian work, the school announced Sunday. Since 1883, the Laetare Medal has been awarded annually to a Catholic "whose genius has ennobled the arts and sciences, illustrated the ideals of the church and enriched the heritage of humanity."

In related news Notre Dame also announced that It would be giving out its first ever "Humongous A-Hole Award". This award will be given annually to someone who exemplifies the absolute worst that humanity has to offer. This year's first recipient will be ___________ specifically because _________________________.

Make them funny and of course you can give as many replies as you want.

-Doc

Tuesday Word Game 2/26

This weeks word game could prove to be hilarious. For this weeks Peach award we are going to the world of Politics and focus on President Bush's trip to Africa last week. According to this article Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice says Ole W knows how to shake what his mama gave him!

The rules are the same as always. Fill in the blank at the end of the actual news article below with a witty (but fake) ending for the story. The one that makes me laugh the most wins my peach award. Of course you can enter as many times as you wish. Just please try and keep it PG-13

Here goes:

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - President George W. Bush has rhythm, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice assured reporters on Friday after watching her boss join African dancers during his five-nation tour of the continent this week.

"I just want to report that the president did a fair amount of dancing when he was in Africa and demonstrated that he can stay on the beat," said Rice, an accomplished musician who loves to dance herself.

"You look sceptical, but I was there? I can certify," Rice added when reporters chuckled at her observations and then announced that during the trip to Africa in addition to dancing President Bush also showed his previously unseen talent for ___________________________.

-Doc

Tuesday Word Game 2/19

Today's Word Game comes to us from the state of Alaska. Fill in the blank portion of this real news article with a humorous off the wall response and the best gets a little prize they can post on their blog if they wish:

Man allegedly squirts bear spray at bar

KODIAK, Alaska - A man faces assault charges after allegedly spraying bar patrons twice with bear spray. Kodiak police charged Daniel Pement after the incidents Saturday and Sunday at the B&B Bar. The spray is a kind of pepper spray used to ward off a bear during an encounter.
Police said Pement was escorted from the bar on Saturday, but returned 15 minutes later and allegedly sprayed customers. Police talked to him later and took the bear spray, but were called away on a more urgent matter.

Reports indicate that the reason Pement gave for spraying the bar patrons with bear spray was _______________________.

-Doc

(my submission: because they were constantly picking on him and his crush on Brittney Spears)

Word Game Winner !

Thank you to all who participated in TuesdayWord Game... Great responses. However I had to pick just one and this weeks winner is Jay the Cynical Bastard.... for this response:

So to ensure that Beijing is ready to host the Olympic games authorities have also decided to ....provide needle disposal stations throughout the event facilities so the athletes can dispose of their HGH supplies properly.

This made me laugh the hardest (and may be not be too far fetched) so congrats Jay ... you won the Peach !!

I hope the peach is showing up properly because my work blocks all photobucket images and I can't tell if it looks right or not... Jay you can e-mail me at docnolz at yahoo if that doesn't show up properly and you want the image code. Congrats again and Thanks for everyone who participated!

-Doc

Tuesday Word Game 2/12

For today's Tuesday word game we go across the ocean to Beijing China where they are busy preparing to host the Olympic games. In order to do that they want to be more friendly to their guests. To show this friendliness they are now bragging about how things are much more civilized in Beijing than before. To prove it they are hanging thier hat on the fact that public spitting went down 2.4 percent in 2007. Interesting you say? Well as cute as that may be its another part of the article that I am taking todays word game from.

Fill in the blankc to complete the article (in a comment) with something offbeat and funny and the best choice will win the peach award. I will make the decision tomorrow morning. Here it is:

"In the drive to reform behavior, Beijing has instituted the 11th of every month as "voluntarily wait in line" day, distributed millions of etiquette pamphlets and threatened to detain boorish fans at sporting events. But city officials cannot afford to let their guard down yet." So to ensure that Beijing is ready to host the Olympic games authorities have also decided to ______________________________.

-Doc

Tuesday Word Game winner

We have a winner in the Tuesday word game !! It was a tough choice because all the answers were really good however someone had to win and this weeks winner is Leighann for her answer:
"Perez Hilton is said to be bent over in anticipation of the arrival of the bus and it's possible extraterrestrial occupants."
Congrats Leighann, that answer made me laugh the most, not to mention a disturbing mental image. So here is your award. It's the BIG PEACH!!
I wanted something with a bit of local flavor so this is a picture of the watertower in Gaffney SC (just google Gaffney Peach) that faces I-85. The big joke of course is that they put the crack of the peach facing the road and it really looks like a "full moon". A perfect and hopefully original trophy for winning the Tuesday word game.

Make sure and check Leighann out at Pessimists need Love too . I have the HTML coding so you can use as a button on your blog if you want to. Just e-mail me at docnolz@yahoo.com and I will be happy to send it to you... Of course I will come up with a new word game for next Tuesday and continue the contest. Thanks to everyone who played. The decision was hard because they were great answers.


-Doc

Tuesday word game 1/29...

OK lets play a game. This should be fun because you guys are very funny and quick thinking. Here is how it works. I will summarize a recent news story and you fill in the next line of the story with a witty or funny but obviously untrue way to end it. Here is the story and a few of my examples:

I read in the news that there is a spy satellite the size of a bus that is going to come crashing down to earth sooner or later. They say that it was launched years ago and was supposed to be the biggest new state of the art technology but it simply never met expectations or worked out like they thought it would. Now it is just dead and will fall to earth soon. __________________________________ . (you finish the story)

My examples:

-White House spokesperson Dana Pirino downplayed reports today that this was the satellite that gave us the inaccurate information on the WMD that were never found in Iraq.

-Campaign officials denied reports today that this satellite actually contained Fred Thompson's Presidential campaign momentum.

-NFL commissioner Roger Goodell today dispelled rumors that this satellite originally worked properly but became non-operational after being tugged out of orbit by the gravitational pull of Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones' ego. The NFL is however worried that it may crash land through the hole in the Texas Stadium roof.

-TMZ.com confirmed today that there is no truth to online gossip indicating that this satellite actually held Paris Hilton's singing career but it may have held her inheritance.

You get the idea... Give it some thought and let's see what you guys can come up with. Let's have some fun with this and if it goes over well we can play every Tuesday!!

-Doc